I’ve Got Anniversaries Out the Wazoo

The Time (Dirty Bit)An anniversary passed recently. It was a weird one because, while it didn’t pass unnoticed, it definitely wasn’t filled with overwhelming sorrow or grief. While the shadow of a child that “might have been” will never (I think) pass without some bitterness, I didn’t feel the need to go somewhere privately and sob for a while. Or days.

This is an improvement. A vast improvement.

When people tell me “time heals all wounds” I always think, “oh yeah, I know that’s true. So I’ll be good in short order.”

But I usually fail to remember that time is less a giant eraser and more a very slow, gradual leak.

Time: every day one drop drips out.

Eventually, the weight isn’t as extreme as it used to be, but that’s not much of a relief in the day to day. I always forget that. It always bugs me. Until enough time has passed. Then I forget again.

Thankfully, very thankfully, enough time has passed for this particular bucket to be (finally) noticeably less full. I don’t really anticipate it ever being totally empty, but I can really appreciate the lack of weight that time has managed to eke out for me. Like woah.

The ministrations of a good therapist and some quality medicinal attention doesn’t hurt, either.

Like woah.



4 thoughts on “I’ve Got Anniversaries Out the Wazoo”

  1. Amen. I also found that the “road stops of joy” between me and the sorrow, aid with the “filling in” of time. Definitely NOT an eraser, but an ability to feel the sun shine once again.
    And ohhhh, am I grateful for that!

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